| Low Cost Airline >Attendant: Welcome aboard Ala Carte Air, Sir. May I see your ticket? >Passenger: Sure. >Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please! >Passenger: What for? >Attendant: For telling you where to sit. >Passenger: But I already knew where to sit. >Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat-locator fee of $5. It's >the airline's new policy. >Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it. >Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not? >Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going to hear >about this. >Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy. Would you >like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you? >Passenger: That would be swell, thanks. >Attendant: No problem (grunts). Up we go, and done! Hat will be $10, please. >Passenger: What? >Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee. >Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it. >Attendant: Actually, you're right - you can't stand. You need to sit, and >fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But first I >need that $10. >Passenger: No way. >Attendant: Sir, if! You don 't comply, I will be forced to call the air >marshal. And you really don't want me to do that. >Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me? >Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee. >Passenger: Oh, all right, here - take the $10. I can't believe this. >Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else I can >do for you? >Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem to >work. Can you fix it? >Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two quarters >into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes. >Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air? >Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of >charge. It's the circulating air that costs 50 cents. >Passenger: I don't have any quarters. Can you make change for a dollar? >Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go! >Passenger: But you've given me only three quarters for my dollar. >Attendant: Yes, there's a change-making fee of 25 cents. >Passenger: For cryin' out loud. All I have left is a lousy quarter? Whatever >will I do with it? >Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory. **************************************** Bolly -Holly Celebs Spotted: **************************************** Love Jokes ? Join Our Group | ||
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